
(I obviously lost my mind every time we passed Patrick J.
MAELSTROM RIDE YOUTUBE MOVIE
Ryan who is also a movie buff, this ex-Hollywood Studios ride was my everything growing up. Where's the feature-length version? The Great White North's finest filmmaker, Sarah Polley, directs this heartfelt and eye-popping documentary, narrated by another of Canada's best, Keanu Reeves. My pitch: The now-shuttered Epcot attraction – essentially a 14-minute advertisement for the majesty of Canada – was honestly just gorgeous to look at. My pitch: How this movie hasn't already been greenlit just boggles the mind: Nicolas Cage plays a grizzled prospector who's tasked with stopping a runaway mine train in a "The Taking of Pelham 123"-style Western thriller. (Seriously, if I wanted a 25-minute lecture about the Constitution, I'd just call my dad.) But "Night at the Museum" is quaking at all the movie possibilities here: Imagine if Daniel Day-Lewis reprised his Oscar-winning role in "Lincoln" to play an animatronic Honest Abe, who gets high off talking to tourists and decides to run for president again in 2024? Michael Douglas will finally clinch an MTV Movie Award for his wisecracking supporting turn as Robot George Washington. My pitch: Sorry, history buffs, but many of us agree that this is by far the most boring Disney attraction.

"You know, it's true what they say: It really is a small world," Ben Affleck tells Jennifer Lopez in their future Oscar clip scene, as the now-newlyweds compete against one another in a genderless supporting acting category. My pitch: A "Babel"-esque drama about a global cast of characters interlinked by a dark secret spanning generations. Returning to her "I Know Who Killed Me" horror roots, Lindsay Lohan plays an American tourist who slowly loses her mind after she's cursed by a three-headed troll (Danny DeVito). My pitch: Eager to give Disney+ subscribers a kid-friendly "Midsommar," the Mouse House hires Ari Aster to make a surreal Norwegian nightmare based on the former Epcot log ride. But when a pre-show meet-and-greet turns into a raucous party at the band's recording studio, the couple must race to make curtain time (with Steven Tyler in tow) in this "Grand Theft Auto"-inspired comedy.

My pitch: Isabelle Huppert is a hardworking PR exec looking to spice up her marriage when she surprises her wife ("Minari" star Yuh-Jung Youn) with VIP tickets to an Aerosmith concert. The ride: Rock 'n' Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith
